


Flower of Eternity

by Kuroki_Yumi



Category: Aldnoah.Zero (Anime & Manga)
Genre: Alternate Ending, Enemy Lovers, M/M, Prisoner of War
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-05-24
Updated: 2017-07-13
Packaged: 2018-11-04 14:55:04
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 7
Words: 12,072
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10993230
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Kuroki_Yumi/pseuds/Kuroki_Yumi
Summary: "When the war ends, there will probably be fireworks.""We don't even know if we will still be alive at that point.""We will be. Let's watch the fireworks together, when that day comes."It turns out that the real definition of losing someone, is to never be able to stand by his side again.✽✽✽An alternate story line where Slaine was sent to the Terrans as a spy.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

  * A translation of [［AZ/奈因］永生花](https://archiveofourown.org/external_works/292452) by 律桢. 



When Inaho and Yuki Kaizuka opened the rusty door of the bottom cabin, it made a shrill sound, like a desperate scream.

The lower cabin was where the captives were held. However, it seemed a little unnecessary to the United Forces of Earth. Since the war between Earth and Mars started, this place was rarely used except for storage purposes when the upper cabins were full. Yuki Kaizuka opened the heavy door, leading to an old stairwell illuminated with dim lights, mixed with a rotten smell of dust and dirt, which made her cough.

“It honestly sucks, being imprisoned here.” She fanned out some light dust in front of her with her notebook, sneaking a peek at her brother, who was on his usual poker face, “Nao-kun? You don’t have to come with me, you know? It is my job to question him, anyway.”

Inaho didn’t answer. He stared at the descending stairwell and stepped down. The narrow staircase fitted no more than two people at the same time, and mottled walls were giving them goosebumps. The lifelessness of the bottom cabin was worse. Since the war started, Inaho had rarely been into places like this, where it was so silent that it sent a shudder down his spine. Yuki-ne tried to say something to him, but she replaced it with a sign.

He knew what Yuki-ne was thinking. For the whole day, Yuki-ne had attempted every method she could think of to convince him to not meet with that person in the bottom cabin. But he insisted on coming.

At the end of the stairwell, the dim lights shone to a row of lifeless prison cells. As they walked by, they could see the shadows of rats fleeing, hearing the sound of their footsteps. _It was really hard to imagine being imprisoned in a place like this._ Inaho thought as he arrived the third-last cell, the prisoner huddled up in a corner.

“Slaine Troyard.”

The boy that was hidden in the dark raised his face slightly. These days of imprisonment had made him even paler than before. The sea-blue eyes lost their shine under the messy bangs of hair.

“Yes.” A small voice answered. Yuki Kaizuka sneaked another peek at her brother, who was, still, holding his poker face.

The boy imprisoned here, Slaine Troyard, had disguised himself as a typical exchange student and boarded this ship, using a fake ID and a hologram to change his identity. He was introverted and untalkative, isolating himself from the crowd. No one had suspected that this boy was working for the Martians for four whole years, sending them updates regarding to Princess Asseylum and the Terran's next moves.

Of course, such espionage activities brought disastrous detriment to the ship. Especially in the recent period, as the war was reaching its climax, their operations were more than once decoded by the enemies. It was fortunate that Inaho was able to turn the tide at the last second and avoided severe casualties.

“You are an undercover agent from the Vers Empire, do you admit?”

“Yes.”

“You work for Count Saazbaum?” Yuki Kaizuka gave out the name of the head of the Mars rebel army. The current emperor of the Vers Empire had been seriously ill; it was only a matter of time for his wealth and power to be taken by someone else.

“Yes.”

Overall, the process of questioning went too smoothly. No matter what kind of question Yuki Kaizuka asked, the dispirited boy self-confessed without refusal. She peeked at her brother, who kept silent the whole time, as she wrote down all the crimes that Slaine had committed, one by one. She thought she would see some emotions from her brother, to see how he had felt for this spy. Disgust? Anger? But Inaho just stared at the boy in the cell, without any expressions showing on his face. She felt her brother had become more and more unfamiliar to her.

“Your motive?” The last question was not on the list.

Slaine’s lifeless eyes shone a little light, maybe it was because of the light reflection, “To help Vers Empire in taking over the Earth. That’s it.”

It was an incontestable answer. Yuki Kaizuka frowned slightly, but eventually closed her notebook. Just when she was planning to leave with her brother, he blurted out,

“What is your motive, say it again.” His monotonous voice did not change.

“To aid Count Saazbaum in taking over the Earth.”

“I am asking for your true motive.” Yuki Kaizuka surprisingly found out that her brother is a bit aggressive right now, “Last chance.”

Slaine's body moved a little, the chain that connected his ankle cuffs made a dull sound with the ground. He said, in a frustrated voice, “I already repeated myself twice, can't you hear?”

“Yuki-ne.” Inaho turned his body, facing his sister, his eyes cold and calm, like an ocean before a storm, “Can you leave us for a second? I want to talk to him alone.”

“Eh? But why…”

“Sorry, I’ll explain it to you later.”

Yuki Kaizuka wanted to see Inaho's face again, to see what he was planning, but he already turned back. She hesitated for a second, reminded her brother to “keep a safe distance” and then left.

Yuki Kaizuka's footsteps were slow. Inaho waited until she carefully closed the door of the bottom cabin, then took out the keys from his pocket, opened Slaine's cell, and stepped in.

_What are you doing? Aren’t you supposed to keep a safe distance?_

Slaine thought, keeping his head hanging down, numbly as Inaho walked towards him. Just when Slaine saw Inaho stopped before him, he was suddenly grabbed by the collar. He was dragged to stand up from the floor. The ankle cuffs made a screeching sound as it dragged across the ground, breaking the deadly silence in the bottom cabin.

The boy that used to be a little shorter than him was now the same height. Like a broken puppet, Slaine was pushed to the icy wall. A terrible pain came up to his back, but Slaine didn’t care. He looked rather a little bewildered, as Inaho stared at him with his steady gaze. “You’re Bat.” His flat voice sounded like a stranger.

They had done a cooperation four years ago, but they didn’t see each other’s face. At that time, the situation was too critical, so Inaho didn't pay attention to his voice. Plus, their voices were distorted after going through the communication device. So when Slaine later landed on Earth, boarded the ship which the Princess was on along with another group of Terran survivors, Inaho didn't recognize him.

Slaine swallowed with a struggle, and nodded his head lightly, “It's me.”

“What are you really after? It’s for her, isn’t it.”

 _You truly are smart._ Slaine let out a bitter laugh.

“Her Highness… If I didn't come, the Count would send someone else to do the undercover work, and he might even order to assassinate Her Highness. Now that I accepted this job, as least I can ensure Her Highness's safety, so…”

“Why didn’t you say that earlier?” Inaho’s hand clutched on Slaine’s collar, pulling him close to his face, “The confession that you just did, how do you expect Her Highness to save you based on that? Even if she doesn’t believe it, you can only be categorized as a member of the rebel army.”

The war was now in its final phase. Everyone on this warship hadn’t had a proper sleep for a few days and nights. The sky outside the ship was filled with smoke, and blasting sounds of explosions never stopped coming. Earth, now hell-like, was in the meantime the field of the last duel. If the United Force of Earth won the war, Princess Asseylum would undoubtedly become the next Empress of Vers Empire.

What would be the consequence for the rebel army, Inaho knew that Slaine understood it perfectly, too.

“... Even if it's for the sake of Her Highness, I am still on the side of the Count. Now that my identity is revealed, my existence will post a threat to Her Highness in the future. So I just admit to being a part of the rebel army, and not make things difficult for Her Highness.”

His voice got lower and lower. Slaine felt he was choking by his collar. Inaho said coldly, “You truly are willing to do anything for her.”

For the Princess, he lived in fear and trepidation for four years. Even so, he was never actually reunited with her. He could only take a look at her from the corner far away. Now that Inaho recalled those moments that he accidentally bumped into Slaine when he was on his way to the Princess, he felt an urge of agitation rising in his heart.

“Yes. Her Highness is my most respected person.” Slaine answered.

There was a moment of silence between the two of them. Inaho felt this impulse in his chest was almost overpowering over his sanity, like a beast.

It was a desire that made him willing to throw himself in. It was like sitting on the edge of a massive cliff and suddenly wanted to throw into the abyss. A fatal impulse.

“Have you ever lived for yourself, Bat?”

_… What is this strange desire._

Inaho’s words woke Slaine up, like exposing a hidden scar that even himself did not know much. “Don’t call me that name.” Slaine began breathing heavily, as his voice started to tremble. Although he was dragged by the collar, he managed to let out an angry shout, “Don’t call me that name!” In exchange, Slaine received a hesitate-less punch in the face.

“Then what do you want me to call you? The fake name that you used to deceive everyone for four years?”

The desire was growing stronger and stronger. Inaho felt he couldn't even recognize himself.

In the meanwhile, Slaine, in a giddiness, recalled a few days ago, when his cover was revealed by Inaho.

In the four years that the war took place, numberless casualties occurred. The anger and hatred towards the Martians had reached a point unable to resolve. At that time, Inaho broke into the room, but locked everyone else out the door, including his sister and classmates. All those people that used to be Slaine’s friends, after knowing him being a spy for the Martians, all wanted to end his life. War was such a thing that made people irrational.

Then, they were alone in this room, as Inaho pulled out a dagger and questioned him. His face was still the same, but his eyes were cold like sharp blades. When Slaine admitted his spy activities, Inaho wielded the dagger. Slaine kept dodging and retreating, as the blade flew by the tip of his nose. He knew that Inaho did intend to kill him, so when he was restrained by Inaho on the floor, he closed his eyes and waited for the blade to pierce his face. But at the last second, Inaho changed it to the handle and injured the corner of his mouth.

He had never seen Inaho Kaizuka like this.

“My friends, my tutors, a lot of people died in your hands.”

At this very moment, in the ice-cold prison cell, the coldness expanded from the wall to his back. Slaine looked at Inaho, straight in the eyes, speechless. He didn’t know what to say in response.

“I'm sorry,” After a while, Slaine answered, “I admit my defeat. Just kill me.” After all, a lost is a lost.

He saw Inaho frowned a little. The next second, he grabbed Slaine by the collar, pulling him close to his face. Their noses were almost touching each other.

“Even if I kill you, the dead won't come back to life.” Inaho’s breath drew near.

What happened. Inaho’s sudden draw-near made Slaine blank-minded for a few seconds. Before Slaine got a chance to steady his breath, Inaho covered his mouth with his. Slaine wanted to push him away, but when his dry and cracked lips touched the moist, it made him feel reluctant to pull away.

“Inaho, I really…”

Slaine couldn't finish his sentences.

Feelings were exchanged in a more efficient way through the exchange of saliva. Slaine surprisingly found out that the person in front of him was actually in pain. Slaine’s cracked lips started bleeding because of Inaho’s hungry kiss, and the two tasted the metallic taste of blood.

“You're my enemy,” Inaho said, as he kissed Slaine's blood-stained lips. Those familiar words, those things that trembled his heart, he suppressed them with sanity. Slaine stared emptily at the darkness, and answered,

“... Yes.”

_… Even if there is indeed anything else, I probably won't be able to say it out loud to you anymore, Inaho._

_I am your enemy. There shouldn't be anything else. We should be pointing our guns at each other the second we meet, but now we're kissing. How ridiculous._

Inaho took a great effort to stop kissing the boy in front of him. But when he pushed him away, watching him crash into the wall a second time, Inaho felt his heart was hollowed up by something. To him, this feeling was strange and unfamiliar.

He couldn’t stay there anymore.

Inaho didn’t say another word and left. He locked Slaine’s prison cell with his very own hands. The boy inside the cell leaned on the wall, slowly fell to the ground.

All of a sudden, Inaho heard the sound of the cabin door slowly opening at the top of the stairwell. From the sound, it was obvious to tell that the person was hesitating and trying to be careful. Definitely someone who didn’t have an authorization.

“Who is there?” Inaho exclaimed.

The sound paused for a second, then a girl's voice came down, “Inaho-kun? … I... I want to see Slaine.”

It was Princess Asseylum.

There was a slight gasp behind Inaho. He turned his head, looking at the boy in prison, who was totally stunned, and said to the Princess, “How did you get in here, Your Highness? It is not a wise choice to come here.”

The rapid sound of footsteps echoed in the stairwell, magnified because of the quiet environment. The Princess’s voice was trembling because of the run, “Please, Inaho-kun! I can’t just leave him like this! I have to see him again no matter what…” A brown-haired girl rushed out the corner as the voice stopped. It’s probably her first time seeing a place like this, Inaho thought, because when she saw the rows of lifeless prison cells, she couldn’t think of anything to say. She could only cover her mouth with her hands, her water-green eyes brimmed with tears.

“... Your, Your Highness.” Slaine murmured as he straightened himself, hiding his ankle cuffs in the shadow as if trying to make himself look less embarrassed.

In the meantime, Inaho walked past Princess Asseylum, warned her in his usual apathetic voice, “maximum five minutes, Your Highness.” he didn't even have to guess, that the Princess had attacked the person in charge of the keys of the bottom cabin. If she stayed here for too long, people would wonder about her whereabouts. Furthermore, if she were revealed to have any contact with a rebel army captive, it would definitely make people raise suspicions about the future Empress.

Inaho walked up the stairwell mechanically, step by step. The prison cells in the bottom cabin kept silent. It was until Inaho walked to the door, when he heard, vaguely, the Princess’s voice from the bottom. Her trembled voice mixed with an overwhelming sorrow.

“Slaine, long time no see…”

Inaho closed the cabin door in silence.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Translator's Note:  
> 1\. The story takes place four years after episode 8 of the first season. Slaine was sent to the Terrans as a spy, working for Count Saazbaum.  
> 2\. It is still unsure if the ship was Deucalion. It is only referred to as "the ship" in the original text, and considering the time, it is possible that it wasn't Deucalion.  
> 3\. "The brown-haired girl" was referring to Asseylum's hologram appearance "Seylum".
> 
> ✽✽✽
> 
> Please leave a kudos or comment if you like my translation! (*´∇｀*) and don't forget to support the original author too ~


	2. Chapter 2

Slaine did have a few attempts to flee from the Count’s control.

His first attempt was two years ago.

Due to the war, the former residents of Ashley Island were nowhere to be found. They fled in a hurry due to the Martians’ surprise attack, so the there were still some remaining resources in the uninhabited village. At that time, the ship which Inaho and Slaine were on had just finished a battle. The communication device was damaged, causing them unable to contact the headquarters to send aids. After a discussion among the staff and a security check of the island and its surroundings, the ship descended on this desolated island at dusk.

Everyone on the ship was divided into groups of two and were dispatched to look for any available resources on the island. Slaine never thought he could be that unlucky, to be partnered with Inaho when the selection was entirely random.

Slaine had been a spy on this ship for two whole years, so he did have some interactions with Inaho, like in the cafeteria or the public bathroom, but there would always be other people around, so Slaine wasn't that nervous around him. He understood that Inaho was not someone that would be fooled easily. So in order to keep him in the dark, Slaine tried his best to change into an entirely different person. Because it was Inaho who he was facing, even if he made the tiniest mistake, his cover would be exposed.

Following Inaho, Slaine walked through the wild grass. He secretly checked his optical camouflage multiple times to make sure it was working properly. If there were any errors, like a sudden change in his clothing or hair colour, Inaho would probably point a gun at his head immediately.

The two of them reached the shore of the island at twilight. They could hear the faint sounds of waves hitting the reefs beneath their feet. Night fell quickly during the winter, and their figures soon turned vague. Inaho stopped in front of an abandoned house that was covered with ivy. He slowly opened the unlocked door, which made a squeaky sound.

Slaine carefully walked in the house with him.

Inside the house, Slaine had noticed evidence of bombing. Due to the enormous hole in the ceiling, the structure of the house was destroyed, and one of the beams hit a place that seemed to be a bedroom. Although it was dark inside, the mess in the house was still visible.

“Be careful not to break the structure,” Inaho stepped over a wooden chair lying around on the floor, “This house might collapse.”

Slaine obediently moved to the west corner of the room with care, maintaining a safe distance from Inaho. There were two wooden shelves in that corner, which contained some wooden handicrafts and books covered with dust, all of which Slaine had never seen before. A few molded chests were beside the shelves, too. Slaine found some leftover gauze bandage, rubbing alcohol, and other medicines, but he was unsure if they were still usable after such a long time. _I’ll probably ask Inaho later, Slaine thought._ As he pushed the wooden chests away, he felt something fell beside his feet.

He turned his head and paid a look, and found out that it was a thin cylinder-shaped object, wrapped with black paper. It wasn’t big, but he couldn’t unwrap the covering. What is this? Slaine took a close look at the object since this was out of his knowledge. _Is this some sort of a weapon? Like a sword or something?_ He thought as he held the object with both hands.

“What are you doing?” Inaho's voice unexpectedly came out from the back, almost giving Slaine a heart attack.

“Ah, no... nothing. I just saw this and don't know what it is.”

Inaho tilted his head a little to see the thing Slaine was holding, “This? This is a hand-held firework.”

“Eh?”

“... You have never seen fireworks before?”

 _Oh crap._ Slaine knew that firework was a very common thing on Earth. He slightly panicked as he turned his head, but soon managed to calm himself, “No, it's just that the country which I grew up in doesn't have fireworks like this…”

Inaho paused for a moment, which made Slaine nervous again. His shoulders and neck became a little numb as he attempted to turn his head to see Inaho’s face. However, Inaho didn’t say anything else and kneeled down beside him.

Inaho unwrapped the cylinder-shaped firework from the black cover and examined it closely.

“I think we can still light it.”

“...?”

Before Slaine could comprehend his words, Inaho put the firework back into Slaine’s hands and left. He returned to where he was before, packaging up the foodstuffs and medicines that he sorted out. Slaine thought for a moment, and eventually decided to put the firework away and started packaging with him. The two went back and forth several times to bring all the useful stuff out of the house. After it was done, Inaho raised his head and looked at the sky.

Slaine was confused, but he raised his head, too. All he saw was the coal-black sky.

Inaho turned to Slaine, looking straight into his eyes, “Where is the firework?”

“Hmm?”

“The one that we just found. The sky is dark now so that we can light it.”

“What… do you mean?”

“Didn’t you say you’ve never seen fireworks before?” In the cold blowing wind, Inaho hid most of his face in the scarf, leaving a pair of clear eyes.

Embarrassed by Inaho's stare, Slaine turned his head, avoiding his gaze, and went back to grab the hand-held firework. When he came back, he saw Inaho picking rocks on the ground. After picking up two satisfying pieces, he stood up and said to Slaine, “Come.”

“Is it okay for us to do this?” Slaine asked hesitantly, “Will we break some rules or anything?”

“We will be okay.” Inaho answered, rubbing the two rocks in his hand, “Come.”

What… are you supposed to do with this? Slaine had no idea how to even hold that firework properly, but he was afraid to ask. Inaho shook his head and helped Slaine to hold it properly, “Here. Hold it tight.”

“Wait, me?”

“Of course you.” Inaho continued rubbing the two pieces. Between the quick movement, a few sparks came out, “Today is your birthday, isn't it?”

“My birthday…” Slaine went blank for a second. _The announcement this morning said today is January 11th… It actually is my birthday today!_ He couldn’t blame himself for not remembering. Considering his identity and the situation right now, he didn’t have the time to remember small stuff like that.

“It seems like it… Wait, how did you know?”

“Two years ago, when you first boarded the ship, you filled in an information sheet, didn’t you? I saw it, and I remembered by chance.” Inaho said, with an unmoving voice.

“Is that so…” In fact, all the other personal information were fake except for his birthday. Slaine did not expect his information to be checked by Inaho. _Would he notice the fraud? It seems like he didn't raise any suspicion. But even if he did… It can't really be seen from his face._

_But, despite all that, he remembered my birthday. Shouldn’t I be a little touched?_

“Okay, it is done.”

When Slaine was pondering, in the meanwhile, Inaho lit the fuse. After it had burned off, there was a moment of silence. Only the sounds of waves crashing onto the rocks in the freezing wind could be heard.

Suddenly, a blue star shooted from his hand. Because of the wind blow, the star tilted its direction and went straight to the nearby rocks. Slaine was shocked that he almost dropped the firework. Inaho, who was by his side, grasped Slaine’s hand firmly.

“Hold it like this, and follow the wind blow.” Inaho held Slaine's hand with one hand and turned his body with the other. Inaho’s lips were right beside Slaine's freezing ear, his warm breath making Slaine too nervous to move, “... Dumb.”

 _… What was that!_ Slaine tried to say something back. Suddenly another star shooted out, a shiny purple one. It went straight to the dark sky, then exploded into a blooming flower.

_Blooming flower…_

Slaine stared at the sky, amazed. Even though he had seen pictures of it in Martian textbooks, actually seeing it in person was another kind of unspeakable beauty.

The flower withered quickly.

“It's gone…” Slaine sighed. But another red one shooted towards the sky before he could finish his sentence. The spherical shape changed colours on the black canvas, bloomed like a peony.

_It really is… a beautiful thing._

In this era full of chaos and despair brought by the war, beautiful things like this were always hoped to stay longer.

Slaine didn't realize that he was staring at the fireworks with such an obsessed expression. Inaho looked at him in silence, hesitated for a second, and asked, “You, really never seen firework like this before?”

Now that Slaine recalled, at that time, Inaho was just asking random questions. However, Slaine over panicked, as he thought that Inaho might figure out his true identity. Slaine answered, in a stammering voice, “Of course not. I saw it a lot of times. How it work is that there is this thing called black powder at the bottom… then there were some chemical substances, something like that… If I remember correctly…”

 _Stupid._ Slaine regretted this choice the second he opened his mouth. He was planning to use something he saw from the textbooks to fool this man in front of him. He was trying to prove his knowledge on the subject, so that he wouldn’t be suspected as a Martian for not knowing the most basic thing.

But Inaho just stared at him, his face unchanged under the fireworks.

“... It is the utilization of different alloys that absorb energy from the explosions and emit color.”

“Huh?”

Slaine was baffled by Inaho’s words. Inaho looked down at Slaine’s hand, and explained, “This one that you are holding right now, it probably contains aluminum or hardwood charcoal powder. After the combustion, the remaining particles in the light frustum undergo a second combustion reaction, which results in the emission of light. Different alloys will result in different colours because of various chemical properties.”

“Oh, ah, that’s why…” Slaine stammered. He really didn’t know what else to say.

_How come the atmosphere turned so bad all of a sudden?_

The last star disappeared from the night sky. Everything was cold and quiet again. Slaine couldn't see Inaho’s face clearly, as the freezing sea wind brought him back to reality. The atmosphere was awkward, or maybe Slaine was the only one that felt embarrassed. He was about to say something, but Inaho took out the earpiece that were distributed for temporary communication and put it on, “What is it? Yuki-ne.”

“What are you doing, Nao-kun!” Yuki Kaizuka’s urgent and a bit furious voice echoed on the quiet shore, so loud that even Slaine could hear it clearly, “It’s already past the time we promised to meet up! Didn’t we agree to come back before sunset? And, what is with the fireworks? We thought you guys were sending out distress signals!”

Inaho was still on his poker face, as if his sister’s reactions were all within his predictions, “Sorry, Yuki-ne. Nothing happened. We are heading back now.”

“You are really a kid, Nao-kun, still doing reckless things.”

Slaine looked at Inaho as he ended the communication, feeling guilty in his heart.

“I'm sorry… That you got scolded because of me.” _Even though he looked like a person lacking compassion, he could actually do something like this…_ “By the way, thanks, for remembering my birthday.”

Inaho stared at him for a second, putting the headphones back in his pocket and started walking, “You're welcome.”

“The firework was pretty.” Slaine said as they head back, “But too bad, this might be the only time we see it.”

Inaho, who was walking ahead of him, paused for a second. He raised his head, but only saw the pitch-black sky. Due to the air pollution that the war had created, there was not a single star visible in the sky.

"When the war ends, there will probably be fireworks."

Inaho said, abruptly, staring at the sky.

However, Slaine fell in silence. When the war ends, he meant the victory of Princess Asseylum and the Unite Forces of Earth. He felt as if he was swallowing knives, piercing his throat. The victory that Inaho was talking about, it was not Slaine’s victory.

It was the adjudication of his demise.

He let out a bitter laugh, "We don't even know if we will still be alive at that point."

Inaho turned his head, "We will be.” He said, in a doubtless tone, “Let's watch the fireworks together, when that day comes."

Inaho started walking towards the ship as he talked, so casual that Slaine didn't realize it was actually a promise.

  


✽✽✽

  


And when he did realize it, he was hiding in a small storage room, preparing a report to the Martians. Slaine only brought a one-way mini communication device with him, since he needed everything to be as simple as possible to hide from people, especially Inaho. He returned to the ship, ate some dinner, and sneaked into the storage room without anyone noticing. It was time for the regularly-scheduled contact, but all he could think of was this man named Inaho Kaizuka.

_Let’s watch fireworks together when “that day” comes? This is nonsense._

Slaine bit his lower lip hard. He wanted to turn on the communication. He knew the Count was waiting for his report, but something deep inside his brain was constantly telling him to stop.

_Betray Mars._

_You’ll never know if you don’t try…? _The sweet little devil crawled out from the swamp of despair._ If I can get out of the Count’s control, and stand on the side of Her Highness without guilt, maybe one day I can reveal my real identity in front of everyone, in front of Inaho._

_… Why don’t I try?_

For the first time, Slaine disobeyed the order.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Translator's Note:  
> 1\. "Ashley island" is a transliteration of the original text.  
> 2\. Apparently it is a hand-held firework, not a sparkler...?  
> 3\. Sorry for my lame translation about the fireworks scene (PД`q｡) In the original text it kept comparing the fireworks to flowers but it looked a little weird if you directly translate them to English.  
> 
> 
> ✽✽✽
> 
> Please leave a kudos or comment if you like my translation! （＾∀＾）


	3. Chapter 3

Three days after the incident.

The Martians’ surprise attack happened while the ship was flying over the Ariel islands. The attack was too sudden and unexpected that the ship was forced to descend on the jagged islands and battle with the Martians on the ground.

That day, they were like a trapped beast. Countless Martian kataphrakts covered them, like an unbreakable net. They were at such a disadvantage, that a group of middle-school students, who were not yet fifteen, had to operate the kataphrakts and join the battle.

“Mom, I'll be okay! … I, I got A on the operating exam, remember? I’ll be fine!” The military uniform looked odd on the thin little girl, who was comforting her crying mother, while her own hands could not stop trembling. Slaine remembered that girl was killed thirty-seven minutes after the battle started. A shell hit the main cockpit of the kataphrakt which she was in, resulting in an explosion. Her body was still nowhere to be found.

Inaho put the communication device in his ear, walked past them without saying a word. Slaine watched as he walked through the hallway filled with turmoil. In the hurrying crowd, Inaho’s shadow looked calm and determined, like always.

  


✽✽✽

  


According to the fake information provided, Slaine was assigned to the control room, communicating with different troops. That battle was tragic. The number of Martian kataphrakts was more than they could handle. In the chaos, a Martian kataphrakt landed on the roof of the control room, causing a massive shake inside. Slaine’s partner fell and hit his head on the corner of the desk, losing conscious right on the spot. Slaine, on the other side, fortunately balanced himself from the shake. In this critical moment, the communication was turned on, and Inaho’s urgent voice came through the speaker, “Whoever is in the control room! Answer!”

The already-damaged electric circuits jammed the communication. Slaine struggled to get up and responded, “Yes, this is the control room.”

The sound of a kataphrakt’s footsteps rose on the top of the control room. Slaine’s hands started to sweat. On the other side of the communication line, Inaho ordered, “Retreat and go to the back! Right now!”

Although Slaine was still unsure about the situation, his body started moving instantly due to the instinct of a soldier. He grabbed his unconscious partner and dragged him, along with the others, to the back of the room. The next second, a huge crash occurred. The whole front glass panel shattered, and the sharp pieces pierced onto the control desk. The control room, now without any protections, became a massive opening for the Martians to advance.

The Martian kataphrakt slowly entered. Everyone in the room was stunned at their places. However, it did not start the bloodshed immediately. Instead, it was turning his head, as if searching for something. Suddenly the kataphrakt stopped when it spotted Slaine, then raised its machine gun, aiming at him.

Slaine’s heart skipped a beat. He understood now, that the Martian kataphrakt’s target was him.

That moment he understood everything. That was a warning from the Count. It wasn’t a coincidence for the Martians to launch such a large-scale attack all of a sudden. It was the Counts warning: if he doesn't contact with Mars regularly, if he doesn't do what he was supposed to do, this will be the consequence.

He didn’t have the choice in the beginning.

   


✽✽✽

  


“Master arm switch. Fire control. Lower Dampers. Position 051, 012. Fire!”

Inko’s voice brought Slaine back to the reality. The UFE army had arrived and joined the battle. The Martian kataphrakt was shot in the chest and was falling towards Slaine.

Suddenly, Slaine saw an orange kataphrakt sprinted towards the Martian kataphrakt. It strangled the neck with its arms and pulled it towards the opposite direction.

Inaho had already made a rough calculation on the Martian kataphrakt. The direction of the kataphrakt falling was all within his prediction, as well. He dragged the kataphrakt and fell down the cliff with it, followed by a huge explosion underneath.

Slaine stared at the slowly-rising dark smoke under the cliff, wordless. The wind blew the choking smoke into the control room, making him cough.

_Orange…_

He managed to get up quickly, and stumbled towards the control desk to reach the communication device, “Inaho! Inaho!”

No response.

The battle outside was slowly ending, some of the troops were already returning. Slaine couldn't care less about the reports from others troops. He clutched to Inaho’s line and called his name with his shaking voice, again and again.

After three minutes that felt like an eternity, a familiar voice came out the other end of the communication, “This is Inaho Kaizuka. The enemy is defeated.”

“Inaho! Where are you?”

“I am okay, but my kataphrakt is destroyed. I am right now trying to climb up the cliff.” Inaho’s voice was still calm even in a situation like this, “Any casualties in the control room?”

Slaine soothed a little, “No. Everyone’s fine.”

“Roger that.” The other side paused a little, then spoke out, “How about you? Are you okay?”

“Uh?”

“I remember you were sitting the closest to where the Martian kataphrakt had attacked.”

“I…” Slaine went speechless for a second. His fingers clutched tightly to the edge of the control desk. He bit his lower lip, anguished, “I’m fine. Thanks.”

_… Thanks._

  


✽✽✽

   


Inaho slowly climbed up from the bottom of the cliff, over the bumpy rocks. When he poked out his head from the edge of the cliff, Slaine managed to pull him up.

Inaho was injured during the battle and the fall. He lied on the ground, coughing hard due to the inhalation of the smoke after the explosion.

At that moment, Slaine realized, that fighting was the way Inaho used to protect him and everyone on the ship. But to Slaine, the way to protect Inaho, protect Her Highness and his former compatriots, was to betray them.

And that was the only way.

_How sarcastic._

  


✽✽✽

   


That day, Shaine resumed contact with the Martians. In a long period of time after that battle, there was never another large-scale attack like such. Many wounded were able to get treatments, and everything went smoothly.

It was just that one day, while everyone was eating in the cafeteria, Calm started a chat about that terrible battle. He sighed, “Maybe it was just bad luck, that we ran into the enemy’s ambush.”

However, Inaho answered, “Is that so.”

“Hm? You don’t think so, Inaho?”

Slaine lowered his head and kept eating. He didn't know if Inaho threw a suspicious glare at him or not. He didn't have the courage to raise his head and look into his eyes.

Moments later, he heard Inaho said, in a quiet but sure voice, “No. Nevermind.”

Slaine relaxed a little, but still felt guilty in his heart.

_He would know the truth one day, sooner or later._

  


✽✽✽

   


And now, Slaine curled in the cold prison cell. The thin layer of clothes he wore was too little to keep him warm. The wound on his lips, caused by the punch and the kiss, was still faintly hurting. Slaine recalled the firework that Inaho had lit for him on the night of his eighteenth birthday, and that pair of clear eyes under the light and the dark. Those were the rare moment of peace and grace.

_But all beautiful things in this world would be gone one day, like a firework. Things, people, and feelings._

Princess Asseylum had just left. In the end, Slaine didn't confess to her his real motive of being a spy. He just admitted being a member of the rebel army. In the past four years, countless souls had lost because of his actions. Even if Her Highness did forgive him, what good did it make?

He couldn’t even forgive himself.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Translator's note:  
> 1\. Ariel islands - transliteration again  
> 2\. Minor changes to a few places
> 
> ✽✽✽
> 
> Heyhey I managed to finish another chapter before I get really busy =7=  
> However the translation might be a little rough, so don't hesitate to tell me if you find certain sentences sounding weird.  
> The next chapter is a short one so I might be able to finish it before the exams (ง •̀_•́)ง wish me good luck!  
> p.s. I am also doing a little tweaking here & there for the previous chapters, so you might see some changes from time to time~
> 
> Please comment or leave a kudos if you like my translations!


	4. Chapter 4

The final duel between the Terrans and the Martians took place in Moscow, the capital city of Russia. There was heavy snow that day. Coldness slipped into the kataphrakts cockpit, making Calm reluctant to step into it.

The main force of this battle was divided into three groups. The directors were giving out instructions on the operation formatting, as well as time and location for regrouping. Calm was listening with all his focus. He used to be a naughty child that couldn't sit and listen quietly for more than five minutes. The four years of war had gradually changed his personality from an immature kid to a soldier who was able to stay focused and obey the orders. And today, this war was coming to an end.

_Only the people who are able to think logically even at the last moment can be considered as truly strong._ That was the commander’s words, but Calm still held some doubts to them. _No weakness, will not get threatened by anything… Do people like that actually exist?_

But he did have a person in mind, a person who qualified for all of the aspects above.

So during the time of the last preparation, Calm went to Inaho Kaizuka. He was adjusting the shoulder strap of his uniform. His eyes, calm like usual but seemed to be dozing off a little,was gazing at an empty spot, as if not paying attention.

“Are you okay, Inaho? Are you worrying about something?”

Inaho raised his head quickly to meet with Calm’s eyes, lowering the hand that was adjusting the suit, “No. I’m fine.”

“Don't mess around with me, Inaho. We’ve been friends for a pretty long time; I can tell when you’re lying.” Calm smiled and patted Inaho’s shoulder, like when they were still back in school, “Everyone is on the assault team with you, Yuki-ne, too, so you’re probably worried about someone at the back… Let me guess, is it Her Highness?”

Inaho didn’t answer. He just kept adjusting his earpiece in silence.

“So for real you…!”

“Shut up.”

“Aww, why so shy? You like her, don’t you? I am in love with a girl, too. I am planning to confess to her after this battle.”

“... So a proposal.”

“Yes, saying ‘I love you.' When do you plan to confess to Seylum… No, Her Highness? I think she likes you, too. For real.”

Inaho sighed, “Calm, I wasn’t thinking about Her Highness."

“... Then why were you so absent-minded just now?”

“...” Inaho went silent for a moment. The snowstorm outside crashed to the ship, making noises that gave people a faint feeling of uneasiness. “I just, don’t like this cold weather.”

Inaho didn’t like the cold; Calm was well aware of that.

But his eyes, unlike the frantic atmosphere before the battle, were melancholic.

   


✽✽✽

   


Inaho did not consider himself to be the type of person that would be distracted by irrelevant matters. To him, the coherent and logical thinking was the most important thing. The final battle consisted of several vast and complicated operations. During the whole process, Inaho calmly analyzed the situation and managed to advance in the flame. A kataphrakt beside him was shot down then exploded, and person inside was his former classmates. Inaho understood, that no matter what happened, he needed to keep fighting. To protect the people around him, to survive the battle and to see the person in his dream again.

To his surprise, what appeared in his mind was Slaine Troyard’s face. That pale face covered with depressing emotions, imprisoned in the dark corner of the cell.

_Want to see him again? No kidding._

Inaho felt a little frustrated with his out-of-control emotions. Although there weren't any changes shown on his face, it was shown through his actions: he started firing the bullets more rapidly, giving the Martians no mercy. Pieces of snow were blasted to the sky due to the explosions and they quickly melted. In this battlefield mixed with flame and snow, the Martian kataphrakts were like ghosts in a dark mist, trampling and destroying this land that had fed countless souls of humanity.

_Are these the people you were fighting for, Slaine?_

When the blade pierced through the enemy's kataphrakt, that one person was always in his mind. He had to admit, that he was thinking about him the whole time even before the battle started. He wanted to let Slaine see with his own eyes: how he perished his companions; how he destroyed the thing that he valued the most. He wanted to break him, to make him collapse, to let him know that what he did was all for nothing. The Princess that he risked his life for wouldn’t protection him nor be thankful to what he had done. In the end, when the Earth achieved its victory, he wanted grab Slaine’s face and tell him, _look, this is the price you pay for being my enemy._

This emotion that made him couldn't stop to want to risk his own life for must be hatred. Inaho thought.

He pulled the blade out from the Martian kataphrakt, walked away as the giant figure exploded behind him. Walked in the smoke and snow, he felt his heart trembling because of that unfamiliar emotion.

The last battle between Earth and Mars, Battle of Moscow, marked the final victory of the United Force of Earth. November 26, 2018.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Mhm another chapter done~  
> This chapter mainly focused on Inaho's side, how he was conflicting between the hate and the "unknown emotion" towards Slaine. Let's see how this comes out (￣▽￣)
> 
> p.s. Next chapter contains a little mature contents and I am really not sure if I should change the content rating to "mature" or just leave it as unrated ⁄(⁄ ⁄•⁄ω⁄•⁄ ⁄)⁄. It really isn't the main theme of the story but it is a pretty big chunk, so help me guys ヽ(*´Д｀*)ﾉ  
>  _[Oh yeah by the way if you don't feel comfortable with the mature contents feel free to not read it, that's why I am giving you a heads-up here~]_


	5. Chapter 5

_Wake up in the dawn_  
_Suffocating in joy,_  
_I look over to the green waves out of the cabin window,_  
_Or stand on the deck during the rain,_  
_Bury myself in leather coat,_  
_Listen to the roaring sound of the machines,_  
_Discard all my thoughts,_  
_But, I foresaw encountering with someone._  
  
_And he'll become my star._  
  
  _—Anna Akhmatova_  


    


   


✽✽✽  
  


 

In the small dorm cabin, Inaho sat on the edge of the bed and stared at the view outside the window. The ocean was gray under the winter sky, mixed with flurries. The waves turned into a shade of black, too uncomfortable to stars at.

Princess Asseylum had just talked to him. While the other person was asleep, she asked him out to the hallway. The war had ended, and she no longer needed to use the hologram to hide her real appearance. Blonde hair flew down her shoulders, too beautiful that it was dazzling. She seemed pale and weak, fighting her tears back as she begged Inaho, “There must be a way to save Slaine, Inaho. We just need to find it…”  


Inaho knew that she had tried all methods possible, but no one was able to come up with a plan. Slaine Troyard’s loyalty to the rebels, to Count Saazbaum, was already an undeniable fact. If the Princess was going to save him at any cost, it would definitely raise suspicion on both sides.   


So he said, “You will soon become the Empress, and a lot of things are going to change for you.”  


“Like how I am not able to make my own decisions?”

“From the second you were born in that royal family, you are no longer able to make your own decisions.”

Princess Asseylum turned and started to weep.

“Then… please take care of him… in his last period of life.” She took another look at the Slaine through the gap of the closing door, sobbing as she said, then turned her fiercely turned her back and walked away.

Inaho was the last person assigned to look over Slaine before he was sent to execution.

The ship they were currently boarding on was destined to Japan. It contained 16 Martian rebel army captives, including Slaine. The execution was decided to take place in Shin'ashihara, where the Princess stand-in was assassinated, where the war first started.

It was Inaho’s homeland, too.   


Soldiers returning to their homes should be an exciting thing, but right now, Inaho just sat on his bed, watched as the sky got darker. Both Yuki Kaizuka and Calm had called him for dinner, but he rejected them all. For several hours he sat there, staring at Slaine. Saline wore the thin gray prisoner clothes, cuffed by the cold handcuffs around his wrists, curled in a ball and slept facing the wall.

To be honest, Inaho did not want to accept this mission in the beginning. He was running away. He felt that he was on the edge of losing control. The things that had happened, the feelings he had held for him, and right now their identities, no matter how smart he was, he couldn't come up with a strategy to face him again.

Just let him sleep forever. Inaho didn't want to see that pairs of blue-green eyes when he woke up.

In the evening, the hallway was more populated, and the chatterings woke Slaine up. He let out a weak groan, turned his back with a little difficulty because of the handcuffs, and met Inaho’s gaze.   


Reason advised Inaho not to say anything right now. Although he disliked the lead-gray sea outside, he shifted his gaze over to the narrow window to avoid eye contact. He didn't want to Slaine's eyes. He didn't know how to face them.  


Slaine did not say anything, either. He lied on the bed on his back and stared at the ceiling. There was an utterly long silence between the two, as if they had never met each other before, as if all the things happened were some dead person’s experience.

Inaho clutched the corner of his clothes stiffly. That again, that strange desire. Thanks to that, back in that prison, Inaho did things to Slaine that he himself could not come up with an explanation, and he couldn't control his emotions during the battle, either. And now, this desire was urging him to go over the line.   


He wanted Slaine to be destroyed, right in front of his eyes. He didn't even want him to be executed by someone else. He wanted to destroy Slaine with his very own hands.  


 _This urge of destruction must be hatred._   


Inaho told himself again, as if confirming the answer to a question.  
  


 

✽✽✽  
  


  
At around midnight, Slaine asked to go to the washroom. Inaho, as the person in charge, had to go with him. On the way back, the hallway was empty; everyone was probably in their sweet dreams. Slaine walked silently in the front. The environment was so quiet that the sound of peaceful waves could be heard.   


Suddenly, Slaine stopped and turned to face Inaho. After a long pause, he opened his mouth, “Thank you, Inaho.”  


“Why are you saying thanks.” _To the cruel person that will send you to your demise, why are you thanking him?_ Inaho thought.   


“Before… When I was imprisoned… I was pretty rude to you. Tomorrow is the execution, so if I don't get a chance to thank you properly now, I will never have the opportunity.” Slaine said, bowed slightly towards Inaho, his hoarse voice a bit trembling, “I'm sorry, Inaho. I have disappointed you. Thank you for taking care of me all this time.”  


Those eyes again, the colour of ocean under the sun.  


_No…_

_That’s enough.  
_

_What does he mean by saying things like this?_   


Inaho stepped up and grabbed Slaine by the collars, his fist against Slaine’s collarbone, pushing him backward. It was fairly easy to do since Slaine’s didn't have a proper meal in the past few days. Before Slaine was able to let out a gasp, his back hit the door frame, so painful that he almost lost consciousness. But Inaho did not stop, he threw Slaine back onto the bed and slammed the door behind him.   


“What are you…!” Slaine watched as Inaho climbed onto the bed and went on top of him. He tried to escape from the side, but Inaho pressed on his shoulders firmly, forcing him to face him.   


“Answer me.” Slaine bent his leg to resist, but Inaho pressed his knee on it, his face was horrifying cold, “If Count Saazbaum ordered you to end my life, would you kill me like all the other people you have murdered?”  


Slaine’s voice was brittle, “... no, I won’t…”  


“Then what about all those things you said during these four years? Were those all your actings?”  


“... They are not!”  


“Don't thank me in that sanctimonious tone of yours, Bat. You are not reconciled, are you?”  


Inaho restrained him without mercy, humiliating him with his expressionless voice. He didn't know why he was saying these things, as if trying his luck to confirm something. That was not like him.   


But the real person that was not reconciled was himself.  


He pressed his lips onto Slaine’s, not in a gentle way. Inaho surprisingly found out that he missed the feel of Slaine’s lips. Smooth, soft, and a little dry. He noticed Slaine’s astonishment but not much resistance, as he lowered his leg that was trying to resist. Inaho sent his tongue into Slaine’s mouth. In the position that they were in right now, it was very convenient for Inaho to seduce him. He poked his fingers into Slaine’s soft hair, held his head slightly upwards, pressing his face against his own. He licked Slaine’s upper jaw with the tip of his tongue and heard a faint moan.   


Inaho felt something wet dripped onto his hand, so he moved away a little to see Slaine’s face: crumpled, trying to hold back his emotions, but still unable to stop the tears from rolling down.  


“No. To me, you're…”  


“I’m what?”  


“What's the point of saying all these now?” More tears rolled down. Slaine lowered his voice, trying to hide the collapsing sound, “You, you're important to me. You to me… It's different from the Princess… But even if I said it, will you believe it? You…”  


Slaine’s voice agitated Inaho even more. He lifted Slaine’s prisoner clothes. It wasn't difficult to remove the thin layer.   


“What do you mean by saying this? Are you expecting me to let you go?” Inaho couldn't control himself from throwing out the bitter words; he felt he was going insane.   


“I am not!” Slaine stared at him furiously, his voice shaking but full of anger, “I… I'm going to die tomorrow anyway, I don't expect you to understand my feelings… Hate me all you want, like I care what you think of me!”  


Since Slaine was still handcuffed, Inaho could only move his shirt to the wrists. Inaho clutched to Slaine’s hands and threw them over his head, the handcuffs crashed to the bed headboard and made a large sound.   


In such position, Slaine’s slim upper body was completely exposed to Inaho. The whip scars were more obvious on the pale skin, beautiful but fragile.   


Inaho whispered in his ear, word by word, “Don't worry, I will hate you for the rest of my life."   


Aside from the hatred, there seemed to be another emotion under the current. When Inaho spouted out his words, another urge rose up and made him furious. He put more strength on the hand that was clutching Slaine’s hands, forcing Slaine to struggle a little because of pain. In the meantime, he reached to Slaine’s crotch with his free hand.   


Due to that kiss full of lust, Slaine was already aroused a little. Inaho’s hand was thin and smooth, more of an adolescent than an adult. His fingers were cold compared to Slaine’s flesh. The cold touch made Slaine curled up his legs, and got hardened even more. He couldn’t stop Inaho because of the handcuffs, so he quitted trying and indulged Inaho’s movements.  


Inaho felt that Slaine was embarrassed, from how his legs were shifting with uneasiness. He decided to ignore and started the work on his hand. Even though his words were cruel and heartless, his caress was very gentle. His finger slightly swept over the glans, sending waves of pleasure to the person underneath. Slaine tried hard to suppress his moans, turned his face to his outstretched arms to hide his blushing face.  


Inaho’s breath was unsteady. He let go Slaine’s wrists and touched his body. His fingers felt the cold sensation of Slaine’s body. He never liked the cold, as he pulled his hand away at instinct, but only for half a second. He touched his body again, this time with his whole hand. As he gently caressed Slaine’s skin, he truly felt Slaine’s body temperature. It was cold. Like soaked in icy water. It reminded him of the roaring ocean waves at night.   


_Slaine belongs to the dark._   


A strange popped up in his head. Inaho stopped caressing Slaine’s dick and removed his top. The body shivered as it sensed the cold air, but Inaho didn't care. He hugged Slaine tightly in his arms, feeling each other's bare body. Slaine shivered when he felt Inaho’s warmth. When Inaho’s started caressing his hardened flesh again, groans of embarrassment came out of Slaine’s throat. He circled his arms around Inaho’s neck. The metal handcuffs sent a cold sensation to the back.   


Inaho could feel the heat escaping his body, warming up Slaine in his embrace. He is alive. His warm breath still lingered around his ear. He is still alive. He could still breath, talk, apologize to him with that panicked face, and stretch out his arms to embrace him. But everything would be gone tomorrow. Slaine would die tomorrow, and he would be the one that sent him to his demise.   


_—What does Slaine mean to me?_   


Inaho felt that this was the first question that he spent so much time on it but still unable to answer. Is it hostility, is it hatred? The urge that made him throw himself down the cliff, the urge that made him risked his life for, is it really just hatred?   


There must be more than that. Otherwise he couldn't explain what he was doing right now.   


As if confirming his idea, Inaho kissed him. It was a soft kiss. Slaine stuck out the tip of his tongue in hesitation, and Inaho licked it gently with his. Just feeling Slaine’s tongue circling his tongue had crash Inaho’s last piece of thought.  


 _This is terrible._   


Inaho understood his feelings toward this Bat a little more.  
  


  
✽✽✽   
  


  
Dopamine, an organic chemical that functioned as a neurotransmitter in the human brain. When it was largely produced, the sense of love would be generated. Pretty straight-forward, Inaho had learned that years ago.   


However, aside from the textbook definition, he did not really understand what love was. He found no difficulties with saying the phrase “I love you” to someone, but he wasn't able to comprehend the feeling of falling in love with someone.

He had read a lot of books and watched a lot of movies when he was little, and the protagonists always fell in love with someone so easily. Is it really that easy?   


“It's you that made my life whole.” Inaho remembered the line he saw on TV. At that time, he asked Yuki Kaizuka, who was crying with gulping sobs on the sofa.  


“Life is incomplete without actually falling in love with someone.” Yuki Kaizuka wiped her tears as she watched the drama, her nose turning red because of crying, “You're still too young, Nao-kun. You'll understand it when you grow up.”  
  


  
✽✽✽

 

   


So that irresistible fatal impulse, that blazing emotion surrounded by despair, was the word that people always said but never got bored. At this moment Inaho finally tasted its sweetness and bitterness.   


_This really isn't a wise choice._ Inaho thought. He slanted his head a little to kiss the corner of Slaine’s lips. Slaine closed his eyes, lips slightly apart as if waiting for more kiss, but Inaho didn't. Instead, he went for Slaine’s lower jaw. Slowly, following the trace of saliva leaked out from the previous kiss, he licked, followed by a small gulp. 

He noticed that Slaine had held his breath, probably because the licking had stimulated him too much.

A burst of raging pleasure reached Slaine’s lower body and Inaho’s hand at its fastest speed. The hardened flesh ejaculated thick fluid in his palm. Slaine gasped, covering his embarrassed face with his handcuffed hands, his whole body was blushing. All these physical features kept reminding Inaho, that Slaine was still alive right now, alive in this world that he could touch and feel.

Inaho had seen too many deaths, too much cold and crumbled bodies. And because of that he was able to remark the warmth of life deeply. Like the one beneath him, the one that he cursed and loved, an alive, lively life.

He grabbed Slaine’s arm and turned him to his back, kissing his back following the spine. His hands went to the front to touch Slaine’s chest, feeling his heartbeats under the skin.  


“Slaine…” Inaho murmured. Not “Bat” or the fake name he used for four years, but “Slaine”. This was the first time he called his real name after his identity was revealed.   


The person at the bottom trembled,   


“... Yes, I am Slaine Troyard.”  
  


 

✽✽✽  
  


 

With the lubrication of Slaine’s come, Inaho thrust in. The inside was cramped and hot, wrapping him tightly. He reached out his hand to touch Slaine’s face. He knew that Slaine was in great pain, because he couldn’t resist but let out a low cry, broken moans came out of his mouth although he covered it with his hands. Cold sweat wetted his shivering back.  


“Are, are you done?...” Slaine supported his body with his knees; his hands clutched to the pillow hard. He turned his face to look at Inaho, his eyes brimmed with tears. He seemed to reach his maximum.  


“It’s only halfway in.”  


Slaine groaned in pain and buried his head in the pillow.  


After Slaine’s body fully adapted his cock, Inaho withdrew a little and then thrust in again. With every thrust there were slurpy, queefing sloppy sounds. Slaine couldn’t hold his body up anymore and let his upper body fall on the bed. Inaho hugged Slaine’s back, feeling the heat from his body and his unsteady breath. He reached into the pocket of his jacket, grabbed the keys and unlocked Slaine’s handcuffs. He threw the cuffs on the side, hugged Slaine tightly in his embrace while he sped up thrusting again and again into Slaine’s body.   


He wanted to tell Slaine, _run away. Run when the ship reaches the shore tomorrow. When I bring you to the handover person, I'll steal his gun and finish him, then shoot myself in the leg. Run away. There is a massive market on the east of the wharf. Just blend yourself into the crowd, disappear out of sight and let's not show up in each other's life ever again._ _  
_

But in the end, this was nothing but a naive and impulsive thought. The logic went over again. He knew that the wharf would be highly secured for the arrival of the Empress, that the chance of Slaine successfully escaping was nearly impossible.   


And even if he did manage to run away, where could he go?  


Inaho hugged Slaine even tighter. Slaine’s voice was wobbly during the movement, “Inaho, will you come tomorrow… hah…”  


Sweat fell down from his forehead. Inaho’s front bane was touching Slaine’s back. He stopped the movement and asked, in a quiet voice, “Do you want me to come?”  


“... 'don’t answer a question with a question,’ isn't this what you always tell me?”  


Inaho thrust him again but more fierce, making Slaine cried out.  


“Just this time, answer me first.” Inaho said.  


Slaine fell in silence, his blue eyes filled with complex thoughts. “No.” Eventually he answered, “I don't want you to come.”  


“Why.” _Not even the last view?_ Inaho started moving slowly again.   


“Be.. because if I see your face there… I probably won't want to die anymore, and that's problematic… Ah…”  


Inaho fell in silence. He withdrew from Slaine’s body, along with some liquid dripping. He turned Slaine over to face him, gently pressed his nose to Slaine’s forehead, kissing the center of his eyebrows.  


“Then I’ll let you look at it now.” _You better not forget my face even when you die._   


He thrust into Slaine’s body again. Meanwhile his fingers reached Slaine’s perineum. He could feel himself inside Slaine and tried to press on a few spots. With every thrust he changed his aim a little, and soon he reached Slaine’s G-spot.  


Slaine suddenly curled up his body as if he got an electric shock. He aroused again and it secreted clear liquid on the top. Inaho steadied his breath, adjusted his aim and sped up the thrusting.  


He kissed Slaine’s eyes, his nose, his cheeks, and his jaw. He left his lips alone, so that he was able to breath. Slaine’s body clung to him without himself realizing, as his chain of thoughts broke down into pieces.   


Their body and sweat were merged to one, but Inaho still felt unsatisfied. He realized how deep and scary his desire towards Slaine was. It was a desire that made him wanted to fuse their souls together.  


And at that point, Inaho thought about destruction again.   


He felt that it wasn't such a bad thing to die with Slaine. At least that way there wouldn't be any obstacles regarding their identities nor their position, and there wouldn't be this torturous situation. He knew that letting Slaine go was a sin, but watching him die was no difference. He couldn't escape the sin no matter what option he chose.   


He understood Slaine better now, that he was always stuck in the gap, excluded by both sides, like a bat. Always alone.  


_Then just let us perish together. We are all driven crazy by this society._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Translator's Note:  
> 1\. The poem at the top is from Anna Akhmatova. Unfortunately I wasn't able to find the Russian→English translation so I translated the Chinese version.  
> 2\. Shin'ashihara → where episode 1 took place
> 
> ✽✽✽  
>   
> Hey hey guess who's back from exams! It took me a long while but I managed to finish this extra long chapter _(:3 」∠)_  
> And as I said I am very inexperienced with translating mature stuff (aka. sex scene) but I really hope you like it!  
>  _secretly clears my browsing data_
> 
> Please tell me if you find something awkward or doesn't make sense! I am always eager to polish my translation to the next level.
> 
> Next chapter will probably come out in a week! That's my promise (≖ ‿ ≖)✧
> 
> Please leave a kudos or comment if you like my translation!


	6. Chapter 6

The vague skyline of the shore gradually appeared in sight. The sky was still dark, but it was slowly getting brighter. Faint lights passed through the small window. Inaho lied on the bed, embracing Slaine, who was still asleep, from the back. He felt the warmth of Slaine’s back touching his chest. In his hand, he was holding a pistol.

He was actually considering this option.

When Slaine woke up, shot him in the head with the pistol, then ending his own life with him.

He could aim at his abdomen so he would die due to excessive bleeding. In this case, he could fake it into Slaine attempted to run away by shooting him in the stomach, but ended up being killed on the spot. Everything was just an unexpected accident.

_Neither Yuki-ne nor other people would get involved._

Just when Inaho was lost in a chain of thoughts, the person in his embrace moved a little. He kissed the back of Slaine’s neck. Slaine turned his body, still half-asleep, and buried his face into Inaho’s arms, arms embracing his hip.

“Good morning, Inaho,” Slaine said, with a muffling voice. His soft hair tickled Inaho’s collarbone, creating an itchy feeling.

“Good morning, Slaine.”

Slaine breathed silently for a few seconds. Then, he smiled, “... I am happy. Really.”

Inaho frowned slightly, “... Why?”

Slaine buried his face in Inaho’s embrace, touching his lips to his chest. Inaho could feel Slaine's satisfied sighs.

“I just feel… that I can die without regret now.”

 _… Is that so._ Inaho thought. _Good_. Immediately he wanted to pull the pistol out from his crumpled jacket by the bedside and carry out his plan. However, there was a knock on the door, forcing him to stop his actions.

“Nao-kun? The breakfast is ready. Hmm? Strange, why is your door locked?”

It was Yuki-ne. Slaine raised his head, totally unprepared for the situation, eyes wide open as if asking Inaho what to do.

“It’s okay, Yuki-ne. I am not hungry.”

“You are always not hungry.” Yuki-ne’s voice sounds worried, “You didn’t eat dinner last night, either… I am worried about you. Your classmates also.”

“……”

“Can you come out and talk?”

“It’s fine like this, Yuki-ne. Nothing inconvenient.” Inaho said, while slowly rubbing the cold, merciless gun barrel in his hand.

Outside the door, Yuki Kaizuka sighed, “... The war has ended, it is hard for everyone just to survive. Especially you, Nao-kun, you are my only family member, we still need to take care of each other from now on… So, if you have something in mind, do talk to me, Okay?”

……  
  
The long silent was giving Inaho a headache. He closed his eyes, one hand still holding the pistol hidden inside his jacket, the other hand gently stroking Slaine’s hair. He answered, slowly,

“I’m just a little tired, Yuki-ne.”

_Too tired._

  
  
✽✽✽

 

After the sound of Yuki Kaizuka’s footsteps had disappeared in the hallway, Slaine said, “it’s nice, isn’t it? To have someone worrying about you.”

“……”

“You should go and live with your family and friends together, Inaho. They need you. Just knowing that you will be living peacefully, death doesn’t seem that frightening to me anymore.”

Inaho’s heart was trembling. The two twisted and complex emotions, like nightmares, were grazing his soul. Can he really discard everything and leave this world with Slaine, as he dreamed?

In fact, he knew the wisest choice.

But sometimes, knowing everything was more painful.

Eventually he let go of that pistol and hugged Slaine tightly with both hands. He couldn't do anything else besides this. Slaine felt he couldn't breathe, barely moved his body. Suddenly, he felt some warm liquid dropped on his forehead, then rolled down, soaked into the sheets.

Slaine asked, hesitatingly, “Are you crying… Inaho?”

Inaho didn’t answer. He just hugged him tightly in his arms, using all the strength he had, and buried his face in his soft hair.

……

_What a beautiful planet._

_No matter how many times I look at it, I would still lose in its charm._

_Do you miss your homeland too? Slaine._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A few changes were made for grammar purpose.
> 
> ✽✽✽
> 
>  
> 
> _The story is reaching to it end! Inaho had realized his feelings towards Slaine but was it too late?_  
>  Next chapter we will be able to know Inaho's final decision and Slaine's end. Let's look forward to it!
> 
>  
> 
> The translation will probably be done in one week, so please stay tuned!
> 
> p.s. I am also planning to write another InaSure fanfic! This will be a short but sweet one =v=


	7. Chapter 7

December 3, 2018, the execution of sixteen Mars rebel army captives, including Slaine, was held in Shin'ashihara at 6 p.m., under Princess Asseylum’s direct order.

That night, Empress Asseylum announced her ascension to the throne. In the meantime, the peace treaty and the anti-discrimination bill were signed, signaling the start of the coexistence between Mars and Earth.

Shin’ashiahra snowed that night.

Just before the execution, Inaho left quietly. He walked by himself on the night-lit streets, surrounded by the joy of victory. Reunited families embracing each other in tears of joy; kids running and laughing in the snow, in their bright-coloured clothes. Everyone was so happy; everyone was full of loves and smiles of peace as they walked pass him.

He was like a shadow that faded into the darkness, unable to locate himself in the cheerful environment.

When he stopped in the crowd, bewildered, fireworks lit the night sky. The sharp sounds shot into the darkness, followed by brilliant fireworks exploding, almost covering the whole sky.

In a crowd of cheers, Inaho raised his head to see the sky. Splendid flowers spread their beauties in the air, then fearlessly ushered into demise. Between the light and dark, Inaho recalled that winter, on that desolated island, the boy by his side who was amazed by a single firework.

_"When the war ends, there will probably be fireworks."_

_"We don't even know if we will still be alive at that point."_

_"We will. Let's watch the fireworks together when that day comes."_

Now he stood there alone, enfolded by the freezing wind of the winter. At that moment, Inaho felt as if he had lost his soul.

It turns out that the real definition of losing someone, is to never be able to stand by his side again.

No matter how bad he missed him, how many times he called out his name, how hard he tried to find him in the crowd, aimlessly and pointlessly, Slaine Troyard, this person will never be in Inaho's life again.

_Is this your way of torturing me?_

_In this long journey of life, where should I go to find you? In this vast universe, where should I reach to see you again?_

_I can't answer this question. You tell me, Slaine._

_Tell me, Slaine!_

……

 

 

✽✽✽

 

  
_The Clouds that gather round the setting sun_  
_Do take a sober coloring from an eye_  
_That hath kept watch o'er man's mortality;_

_To me the meanest flower that blows can give  
Thoughts that do often lie too deep for tears. _

 

_—William Wordsworth_

 

 

✽✽✽

 

 

The mild wind gently blew through the woods in the suburbs, the early morning rain wetted the flagstone road, creating a faint smell of soil.

The black-hair boy held an umbrella, walking alone on that empty path. Here was where countless soldiers of war eternally rest. There would always be all kinds of flowers in front of their grave. Those flowers, already rotten because of time, lying in front of the soldiers’ gravestones, waiting for the final moment.

Only there is nothing in front of Slaine's grave. No one would pay a visit to the place of this man’s burial.

Inaho bent down, putting a posy of white campanulaceae, tied with blue ribbons, in front of his gravestone.

The surrounding area was quiet, so quiet that the sound of raindrops hitting the leaves could be heard. Inaho stood there for a long time, as if he was not staring at the cold gravestone, but Slaine’s sleeping face, calm and peaceful.

The eyes he missed, the smile he missed and the blazing life under his palm, rest here eternally. He knew it perfectly that one day he would leave this world as well, and that day would be the end of these thoughts.

He always believed that death meant the cessation of all neural activities and biological functions. However, Yuki-ne said that people would go to another world after they died, and everyone would see each other again.

_Is that so?_

_Then I'll pray to reunite with you again one day._

_But before that, I want to tell you, those words that I couldn't get a chance to say._

_Forget the dark, horrifying smoke of war, put aside the craziness and helplessness brought by the endless battle, when I unveil the mask of hatred that blinds our eyes, I just want to tell you,_

"Slaine... I love you."

Inaho gently caressed the name carved on the gravestone. White doves flapped their wings, travelled through the woods in the slight drizzle.

"I love you."

He wanted to let him know, that on this world, the chaos will always contaminate the pure. Many beautiful things will eventually wither and decay in this lengthy, eternal time.

But some things will not.

"I love you, Slaine."

 

✽End✽

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> And then we reached the end @_@ _(handing out tissues)_
> 
> I just wanted to say thanks to everyone's support! This is my first translation project and I am glad that I completed it.
> 
> I hope you enjoy this story!
> 
> ps. I need some suggestions of the additional tags! ｡･ﾟﾟ･(>д<)･ﾟﾟ･｡


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